I hate the fact that many people are assuming that I have changed in a very negative way. All I know is, from being a people pleaser I have turned into someone who knows her self respect.
tanisha
I dont please people anymore, it’s not ego, not attitude. Its just the way I have developed myself.
I used to be someone who would text you 1000s of times even after knowing that you might not reply me. Not just to male friends but to female friends as well. I used to text them and tell them that I miss them.
It took me a lot of time to realise that none of them really cared much. They weren’t waiting for my msg. They weren’t waiting for me to check in on them. Neither did my ‘hey, I miss you’ or ‘this reel reminds me of you’ ever mattered to them. I felt bad to know that I was the only one checking up on people if they went ghost or the only one who came back home and wrote a short thankyou message for anyone who made my day the best.
Tanisha
Slowly and steadily I kind of changed myself. I no more texted thankyou messages, or a caring how are you to anyone. Neither did I awaited for anyone’s message.
This happened to be a huge change for people who were loving me when I was able to please them. The thought of this sounds dissappointing. Yet tho I continued to have this new version of myself.
I have few lessons to tell you:
- Random check-in and cute messages for people is not being goofy, it’s being a people-please.
- People who complaint for you being changed, arent the right ones to judge you cause they literaly wish upon you being only good when you are sweet.
- There is no harm in being calm, kind and sweet. But if you spend over months with someone then you have to know that calmness, kindness and sweetness turns into, facts, reality and truthfulness.
- Learn to stay with people who rather appreciate your bold move of raising your standards and being straight-forwards in a respectful way.
- People who stay amidst your upgrading personality, you can please them sometimes, they deserve some extra love!
Remember to set boundaries.
If you are someone who is a very open hearted person, then something is wrong! If you are someone who spills all beans about yourself, then something is wrong!If you are someone who loves everyone, then trust me, something is wrong!If you are someone is loved by all, someone who is good to every individual, checks-in on people and misses everyone, then something for sure is wrong! Look at the world with a broader perspective.
A perspective says we all are human and a sharp minded perspective says, save yourself from who tries to drown you. And inorder to save yourself you cant be a people pleaser. You will have to defend yourself, protect yourself and fight for yourself.
~ Tanisha
Also Read:
- How to move out of comfort zone? (motivation prologue)
- Do you regret not having clarity?
- Do real men say ‘you’re mine’ ??
- How do you make your life better?
- Is therapy necessary?
